Friday, February 26, 2010

The Brightest Day

(Minor spoilers for Green Lantern books beginning in April. Nothing beyond what the solicits say, but if you don't like reading solicits, then go no further.)

I'm not here to talk Blackest Night. No, that's being talked about everywhere now that #7 is out, and some people have already provided some excellent analysis of the happenings in there.

I haven't been sure what exactly to expect from Brightest Day, because so much depends on how Blackest Night ends, and we don't know what's going to happen there just yet. Obviously certain people are coming back to life, certain people aren't, and some of the people I feared might die are going to come through hale and hearty!

Guy is getting his own book, so that means he'll make it through in some form or another. Ice will be featured in Generation Lost, so she'll make it through somehow. I would still be worried for Sinestro, given his current state (I predicted ages ago that Johns would have him die a hero at the end of this somehow), but the solicits for Green Lantern in the coming months have revealed that he'll make it through alive, too -- we just don't know what he'll be wearing.

But I've decided that, from what little the solicits have revealed, the storyline in Green Lantern after Blackest Night is over has the potential to fulfill one of my geekiest dreams: apparently the "New Guardians" are going to be forced to make Earth their new home, for reasons that will apparently be revealed in the May issue of Green Lantern (assuming the solicit doesn't lie, which they often do).

In addition to Hal and Carol, that's Atrocitus, Larfleeze, Saint Walker, Indigo-1, and Sinestro living on Earth.

I'll admit, this sort of thing is one of those cheesy, ridiculous storylines that often plays out in my head, but I've never actually written it because it's very hard to write something like that to its full potential while keeping it from turning into... well, a cheesy, ridiculous storyline. Maybe it's because Earth and its customs are what's familiar to us, but putting characters like this into a context where they can be forced to deal with things that, to us, are mundane, is something that's just fun to imagine. And

It reminds me of the old GLC of Earth days, when they had their pretty headquarters that Guy got banned from after he spiked the water and made Salaak see pink elephants. Maybe they'll bring that old place back, and rebuild it nicely, as I think the last time we saw it, Guy and Kilowog had destroyed it in a fistfight, and it collapsed on Arisia's head. Wouldn't it be awesome to see that place again?

Please, please, please tell me that they will all live together in this same house, like a Rainbow-Colored Brady Bunch -- and that Dex-Starr will be their cat and claw the curtains and spray all over their furniture, resulting in fights between Atrocitus and Sinestro because Atrocitus won't neuter his kitty and Sinestro is VERY meticulous about his housekeeping! And Larfleeze will take up residence in the basement, because no one else can stand his stench or his fleas, and he watches them through the floor vents and covets their possessions.

Honestly, picture it:

Atrocitus: "WHO USED ALL MY SHAMPOO?"
Sinestro: "Don't any of you people know how to fold laundry? My pants have to be re-dried and creased all over again! And... WHY IS THAT CAT IN MY ROSE BUSHES AGAIN?"
Pizza Delivery Girl: "Uh, yeah, who ordered the seventy-five fully loaded pizzas?"
Larfleeze: "MINE!"
Pizza Delivery Girl: "Whoa, dude, come back! You have to pay for those!"
Indigo: "I'm sorry, I can't help you. My deus ex machina power is depleted."
Pizza Delivery Girl: "..."
Hal: "Oh hey there. Want to see my cockpit?"
Pizza Delivery Girl: "..."
Hal: "You've never flown with me before."
Carol: *sigh* "Here, Pizza Girl, this should cover it. And for God's sake, don't step on the begonias on your way out. Sinestro will have a stroke."
Sinestro: "Silence, you walking venereal disease. Your very presence in this house gives me a burning sensation where one ought not burn."
Atrocitus: "SERIOUSLY -- MY SHAMPOO! IT WAS IN A WHITE BOTTLE. IT SMELLED REALLY NICE. WHO USED IT?"
Saint Walker: "All will be well!"
Carol: *facepalm*

5 comments:

SallyP said...

Can't...stop...laughing...! It would be so much fun for them to do it as a cheesy old sit-com.

Oh Hal. Seriously, Sinestro and Carol are going to have to start hitting you on the nose with a rolled up newspaper if you don't stop hitting on the delivery girl.

Sea-of-Green said...

Ha! Brilliant! And, of course, you're right -- Carol is the only one in that group with ANY sense.

I'm glad I'm not the only person who's been reminded of the old GLC of Earth days. Maybe they'll even dig up that old ski lodge in the woods that used to be the old GLC headquarters. :-) Oh, the shenanigans!

And, of course, the fact that Hal gets stuck with THAT group is going to make both John and Guy LAUGH, and LAUGH, and LAUGH ...!

Duskdog said...

I really hope they use the ski lodge. I can't imagine them going their separate ways... I mean, maybe Sinestro has some cash stashed away, and can reign in his ego long enough to deal with a landlord, but can you imagine Atrocitus or anyone else finding their own place? Getting a job?

Ha, no, they have to all live together. I'd say it's like "The Real World" but it's really probably more like "Drawn Together".

Clearly Geoff Johns has been reading minds, or maybe just sharing mine and Tsuzuki-kin's brainwaves, because we have conversations about this sort of thing all the time.

Duskdog said...

Tsuzuki-kun, even. My fingers fail at Japanese.

Tsuzuki-kun said...

You're right... that's the GL world in the Drawn Together house. I love it!